Examining life with a chronic illness. How to be your best while feeling your worst. DIscovering who you are and why anyone should care. Living to the max....and loving yourself even when you're not who you thought you'd be.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Not enough hours in a day!
I have such a dilemma. My 'to-do' list is SOOO long and full of chores (more than my usual) and even though I seem to be getting to them one-by-one, I still feel as though I can't keep my head above water!! And the 'dilemma' is the fact that I just don't have the *ENERGY* to get to it all. It's one of the most frustrating aspects of this illness. My head and my heart say: "I have all these desires and wishes and goals and I need to DO them!" And with that, my body responds "Yeah, right!! That's not gonna happen!" <sigh> It's something I'm used to by now (33 years) but somehow, it's still one of these areas that I find difficult to deal with. Should I be less ambitious? How can I still be productive and purposeful within the parameters of a body that does not cooperate? Just one of the challenges of living life with a chronic condition...one of many. I guess what I do is simply this: I take it one-day-at-a-time. I do what I can do when I can do it. And when I can't...I don't. This week, I am preparing for my beautiful granddaughter's first birthday which we are celebrating in my home on Saturday. Thirty+ people. Still have some shopping to do and preparing a few little dishes. Fortunately, everyone's doing something...so it's not all on me. And then the following day I will be a vendor at a fundraiser for lupus called "Blues On The Bay". There's always LOTS to do before a craft show or fundraiser like getting pieces in order, polishing up some jewelry, making sure they're priced, getting my business card together (YIKES, something I forgot to put on my 'to-to' list!) and getting it all packed up along with displays & tables & gift bags OH MY!! My b.p. is going up as we speak. All I can do is pray for less pain this week and more energy so that I can accomplish AT LEAST the bare minimum of what I hope to accomplish. Wish me luck?
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Good luck. I know this must be hard for you. Do you have lupus? My brother was diagnosed with lupus some years back. Luckily he's been in remission for a few years now.
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